As a woman, I just hope that one day I have as many rights as a gun does.
— Alison Leiby (@AlisonLeiby) December 17, 2015
I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, b/c I didn't immediately get out of his way as he was walking towards me & now he's perplexed.
— Frankie (@phranqueigh) August 25, 2016
When a guy gets dumped by a girl and says, 'She had issues,' I assume one issue was that she didn't like him.
— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) October 7, 2014
WOMAN: I wish to no longer be mansplained things
GENIE: Okay {POOF} *turns her into a guy*
MAN: What I actually meant was…
GENIE: oh jeez
— Todd 'Spooki' Carlos (@TheToddWilliams) June 10, 2016
i'll rest my bitch face when I'm dead.
— Kim Monte 🍂 (@KimmyMonte) August 23, 2017
Telling a woman to get back in the kitchen is a weird insult to lob on Twitter. We can still tweet from kitchens. We have wifi & data plans.
— Undead Marble (@living_marble) April 14, 2016
did u get my dm pic.twitter.com/YFtay3nSpZ
— Cursed n H-OooO-ward (@emotionalpedant) September 25, 2015
When men have the flu vs when women are on their deathbeds pic.twitter.com/YrDbNY0XSt
— melyssa ford. (@jameelajoie) September 18, 2016
The patriarchy's fatal mistake was installing windows over the kitchen sink so we could see what was outside.
— A Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) January 13, 2015
"Where'd you meet him?"
"On the Internet. I fell in love with him because of the delicate care he used to explain my joke back to me."— Kashana (@kashanacauley) June 15, 2016
Sometimes I'll buy some crap online and be like this will fix my whole life
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) September 23, 2014
Misogynists: my dick does whatever it wants
Male feminists: it just makes me so sad that my dick does whatever it wants
— Holly Green (@winnersusedrugs) August 20, 2017
The Venn diagram of men who say women take too long to get ready and men who ask if you're sick when you're not wearing makeup is a circle.
— Siobhan Thompson (@vornietom) November 20, 2014
"No more self-deprecating tweets," I whisper fatly.
— J.Beaner (@jeannerbeaner) September 23, 2014
a boy during sex: *does nothing at all* pic.twitter.com/qEVzIYHfUQ
— 🕸lil tiny isabel ¨̮ (@lSABABE) March 28, 2017
More ladies should leave internet comments on men's accomplishments like "he sucks as an astronaut but i'd sit on his face"
— dr. dalia ☥ (@DALIAMALEK) May 30, 2015
Tinder but for gals in your area who'll come over and help with the weird zip on the back of your dress in the morning.
— Ailbhe Malone (@ailbhetross) June 22, 2016
*Clicks post called "Simple Everyday Eye Makeup Look"*
*Sees the look requires 9 steps*
*Throws laptop across room as if at the patriarchy*— Chloe Angyal (@ChloeAngyal) December 22, 2015
[1789, woman opens beautifully wrapped hand delivered message] Oh my…yet another gentleman caller has sent me his penis portrait…
— bela lugosi's beth💀 (@bourgeoisalien) February 22, 2016
Browsing Tinder like pic.twitter.com/uTQnfAFeAP
— Bim S Pumpkins @NYCC (@bimadew) April 5, 2015
Hunger Games Synopsis
Katniss: I'm in over my head, the govt wants me dead, I'm scared
Both Male Leads: Ok but do you LIKE like me— regal trash bitch (@meatgrindr) September 12, 2017
Stop tweeting about what real women are and are not. You're going to blow my secret that I'm a lizard creature zipped into a woman suit
— The Tale of Chelp 🔥 (@legendofchelda) November 7, 2015
If you think you have a stupid question, just remember NASA engineers once asked Sally Ride if 100 tampons were enough for a 7 day mission.
— SpookySandwich (@MarisaLange) November 19, 2014
boy: i wished girls liked sports
girl: i like sports
boy: oh yeah name the blood type of the seahawks coach from the 1990s— jordan rose (@maliagif) May 17, 2015
When a man tells me he's looking for a 'real woman' I scurry away because I'm actually three owls in a raincoat AND HE MUSTN'T FIND OUT.
— Aimee (@Mimiification) July 1, 2017
This is what happens when men have creative control.
A butt crack on top of another butt crack. pic.twitter.com/nrcd75xpY9— Beth Elderkin @ NYCC (@BethElderkin) August 17, 2017
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